Conception
There are some pretty important basics that you should be aware of if you want to successfully conceive.
Successful conception is dependent on a man producing a healthy sperm, which then fertilises a healthy egg from a woman. What you may not be aware of is that beyond just having regular intercourse, there is a rather tricky sequence of events involved.
If your partner has talked about ovulation, checking mucus, checking body temperature or working out the length of her cycle and you are not entirely sure what this all means, then read on.
Ovulation Ovulation is the development and release of an ovum (egg) from a woman's ovaries. A woman is fertile around the time of the month that she is ovulating. The Ovarian cycle, which results in a woman having a menstrual period, usually occurs in cycles of approximately 28 days (though this can vary). Ovulation generally occurs at about the middle of the cycle, or 14 days before the first day of a woman's menstrual period.
Many women find that it can take time to accurately determine when ovulation is occurring . While there are various indicators, they are not always as straight forward as they sound. Two ways that women can determine whether they are ovulating are;
Observing changes in cervical mucusMucus increases in volume as the monthly cycle progresses and becomes more plentiful and slippery (often described as the consistency of raw egg white) during ovulation.
Checking basal body temperatureIf your partner is checking and charting her temperature every morning, she is looking for a pattern during her cycle, which will indicate when she is ovulating. Prior to ovulation temperature drops slightly, then following ovulation temperature increases and remains high for the rest of the cycle. Once this pattern is determined, you will know your fertile period of the month.
EjaculationAs you know, this is your job! On average about two thirds of a teaspoonful of seminal fluid is expelled on ejaculation, containing about 210 - 525 million sperm. About one quarter of these sperm will be abnormal and the remaining three quarters will be capable of independent movement which is needed to reach the fallopian tube. Once the sperm enter the vagina, they will be deterred from continuing on their path by the slightly acidic vaginal secretions. Of the millions of sperm released in each ejaculation, only a few hundred will reach the female egg in the fallopian tube.Conception Prior to conception, an egg was released from one of your partner's ovaries and began to travel down the fallopian tube. At the moment of conception, one of your sperm met, entered and fertilised your partner's egg, which then sealed itself off to exclude all other sperm.
When your sperm fertilise your partner's egg, the genes or chromosomes from each of you combine to create a cell. This cell then starts to divide, becoming a collection of cells, or blastocyst.
The blastocyst continues to divide and grow, moving down the fallopian tube until it reaches the uterus (or womb) between 3 and 7 days later. Once in the uterus, the blastocyst will implant itself into the lining of the uterus, but before this happens, a change occurs. The blastocyst creates a liquid pocket in its centre. This fluid space creates a division in the blastocyst, resulting in an inner cell mass, which will form the embryo, and an outer trophoblast, which will form the placenta.
About a week after conception, the outer cells help the blastocyst to implant or embed into the lining of the uterus so that it can seek nourishment. As a result of the hormone changes following conception, the lining of the uterus has already become thicker and has an increased blood supply in preparation for implantation. The process of implantation usually takes about one week.
When is the best time to have sex?A woman's most fertile period is from four to five days before ovulation to 24 hours afterward. Basically, sperm cells can live for 72 hours but unless fertilised, ova survive no longer than 24 hours.
If you and your partner are trying for a baby, the best times to have intercourse are in the days immediately preceding ovulation and the day of ovulation. If your partner cannot determine when she is ovulating, one suggestion is to have intercourse every second day from day 10 to day 18 of her ovarian cycle (the most likely period of ovulation for most women).
When should you worry about your fertility?Considering that at your most fertile peak (around 24) you only have about a 25% chance of falling pregnant during every cycle, most Health Practitioners will probably advise you not to worry for at least twelve months. In most cases, specialists will not see you until you have been having regular intercourse and trying to fall pregnant for at least a year.
Remember, while it often seems that everyone else suddenly fell pregnant, they may have been trying for some time. The best way to increase your chances of falling pregnant each month is to identify your partner's peak fertile period and then ensure you have sex at that time of the month. If you have any concerns, however, it is important to talk to your partner, and your Health Practitioner to get answers to your questions.
Sometimes it is useful to talk to others to find out how long it took them to fall pregnant. You may be surprised to find that it's not uncommon for a couple to take over twelve months to fall pregnant, especially as they get older.
My partner seems preoccupied with falling pregnant. Is this normal?While you may not be concerned about how quickly your partner falls pregnant, she may seem to become pre-occupied about fertile periods and how long it is taking.
Remember that a woman who is trying to fall pregnant has made a committment to a major life changing experience - for many women this usually involves making some fundamental lifestyle choices! Having decided to have a baby, women should avoid alcohol and cigarettes, eat a healthy and nutritious diet, start an exercise routine and make any other necessary adjustments to their lifestyle BEFORE falling pregnant.
Having done all of this, your partner usually won't be able to confirm a pregnancy until at least two weeks after conception or until her period is late. This means that for at least two weeks of every menstrual cycle, your partner is aware that she "might" be pregnant. It is difficult for a woman not to feel preoccupied under these circumstances.
Also, as many couples are postponing having children until later due to career, travel or other reasons, the tendency for a woman to plan her life, including planning when she will have a baby, is common. Many women are accustomed to making a decision and acting on it, while conceiving a child does not fit into that mode of thought. This can be extremely frustrating in itself.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Atom Smasher Breaks down
The huge particle collider built to simulate the conditions of the "Big Bang" will not restart until the European spring 2009 after a weekend technical glitch, the European Organisation for Nuclear Research (CERN) said on Tuesday.
A helium leak into the tunnel housing the biggest and most complex machine ever made forced CERN to shut down its Large Hadron Collider (LHC) on Saturday, just 10 days after starting it up.
CERN Director-General Robert Aymar said this was a psychological blow after a successful start of the LHC following years of painstaking preparation by skilled teams of scientists.
"I have no doubt that we will overcome this setback with the same degree of rigour and application," he said in a statement.
The most likely cause of the leak of helium into the LHC's 17-mile (27-km) tunnel under the French-Swiss border was a faulty electrical connection between two of the accelerator's giant magnets, CERN said.
For a full understanding of the incident scientists must now raise those sectors of the tunnel back to room temperature from its operating temperature of minus 271.3 degrees Celsius (minus 456.3 degrees Fahrenheit) and open the magnets for inspection, a process taking 3-4 weeks.
This investigation and repairs, followed by CERN's winter maintenance period, will push back the restart of the accelerator complex to early spring 2009, CERN said.
CERN will then resume sending beams of particles around the tunnel, as it did successfully after starting up the LHC on Sept. 10. The next step is to smash beams travelling in opposite directions into each other at nearly the speed of light.
This would attempt to recreate on a miniature scale the heat and energy of the Big Bang, the explosion generally believed by cosmologists to be at the origin of our expanding universe.
At full speed the LHC will engineer 600 million collisions every second of subatomic particles called protons, which will explode in a burst of new and previously unseen types of particles.
The experiment could confirm the existence of the Higgs Boson, a theoretical particle named after Peter Higgs who first proposed it in 1964 as a way of explaining how matter has mass.
CERN, which has had to dismiss suggestions that its experiment could create tiny black holes of intense gravity that could swallow up the whole of planet Earth, says there was never any risk to people from the malfunction
A helium leak into the tunnel housing the biggest and most complex machine ever made forced CERN to shut down its Large Hadron Collider (LHC) on Saturday, just 10 days after starting it up.
CERN Director-General Robert Aymar said this was a psychological blow after a successful start of the LHC following years of painstaking preparation by skilled teams of scientists.
"I have no doubt that we will overcome this setback with the same degree of rigour and application," he said in a statement.
The most likely cause of the leak of helium into the LHC's 17-mile (27-km) tunnel under the French-Swiss border was a faulty electrical connection between two of the accelerator's giant magnets, CERN said.
For a full understanding of the incident scientists must now raise those sectors of the tunnel back to room temperature from its operating temperature of minus 271.3 degrees Celsius (minus 456.3 degrees Fahrenheit) and open the magnets for inspection, a process taking 3-4 weeks.
This investigation and repairs, followed by CERN's winter maintenance period, will push back the restart of the accelerator complex to early spring 2009, CERN said.
CERN will then resume sending beams of particles around the tunnel, as it did successfully after starting up the LHC on Sept. 10. The next step is to smash beams travelling in opposite directions into each other at nearly the speed of light.
This would attempt to recreate on a miniature scale the heat and energy of the Big Bang, the explosion generally believed by cosmologists to be at the origin of our expanding universe.
At full speed the LHC will engineer 600 million collisions every second of subatomic particles called protons, which will explode in a burst of new and previously unseen types of particles.
The experiment could confirm the existence of the Higgs Boson, a theoretical particle named after Peter Higgs who first proposed it in 1964 as a way of explaining how matter has mass.
CERN, which has had to dismiss suggestions that its experiment could create tiny black holes of intense gravity that could swallow up the whole of planet Earth, says there was never any risk to people from the malfunction
The 7 secrets of a Conient & Secure Woman
The Seven Secrets of a Confident & Secure Woman by Scott Smallwood
1. A confident & secure woman REPOSITIONS HERSELF
A confident woman never forgets the one thing that never changes –THINGS CONSTANTLY CHANGE.
With the winds of change ever blowing, a secure woman realizes that she may not currently possess all the tools that will take her to her goal, but she’s always ready to learn what she needs to know in order to get there. This may mean going back to school, changing job or vocations or even moving to a different location, but she is ready, willing and able to adapt to changing circumstances.
2. A confident & secure woman KNOWS HOW TO GIVE AND TAKE
A confident woman understands that the gift is in the giving. She knows the laws that tell her what she gives will return to her several times over. She will give her time, energy and even her heart to those who need her. However, she also knows that she is not a super human and she does not over-extend herself. She regularly takes time for herself! She also recognizes that she has limits and, at times, finds herself in a position of needing assistance and is not afraid to ask for what she needs.
3. A confident & secure woman LIVES IN THE PRESENT
Dwelling on the past or worrying about the future is the bread of idleness that a confident woman refuses to eat. When recalling the past, she does not allow herself to dwell there but, rather, refocuses on the here and now. She understands that her past experiences, whether joyful or painful, are a part of her and have made her the confident person that she is today. She learns from the past and uses that information for current decision making. She has hopes for the future and engages in the occasional daydream while keeping herself solidly in the present tense of her life.
4. A confident & secure woman KEEPS HERE EYE ON THE PRIZE
Not everything we do comes up roses. To expect perfection is cavalier, but to know that mistakes are a part of the journey is wisdom. This knowledge allows the confident woman to refuse to pity herself when something doesn’t turn out as she’d hoped or expected it would.
5. A confident & secure woman KNOWS HOW TO SAY NO
Women have too little time and too much responsibility. The demands of jobs, child care, household duties, etc. are often draining. Having time to herself seems to be a far-fetched dream for many women.
The confident woman knows her limits and her need for self care. She understands that in order to be able to accomplish all that she wants/needs to do, she MUST have adequate energy reserves from which to draw. While sympathetic and even flattered when her phone rings off the hook with others making requests of her, she is able to pick and choose those people or causes to which/whom she will devote her time and energy. She knows when she needs to politely decline so that she will have time to recharge herself or to ward off becoming overwhelmed. She also does not feel a need to offer apologies or excuses for needing to do so.
6. A confident & secure woman TRUSTS HER INNER VOICE
While she may occasionally feel uncertain or seek the counsel of others, the confident woman knows deep down that her own heart will give her the direction she needs. While this intuition may be said to be a characteristic of all women, it is one that becomes refined only with age, wisdom and experience. The secure woman will carefully consider all the information at her disposal, seek advice from those she respects and then turn to that little voice inside of herself and become her own best counsel.
7. A confident & secure woman DOESN’T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF
If we allow ourselves to think too much about something or consider every little thing that could possibly come up or go awry, we can soon make mountains out of molehills. The secure woman is able to separate the chaff from the grain and focus only on those things of primary concern to her in any situation. She does not micro manage herself or her affairs. Rather, she focuses on the broader picture along with the key ingredients that are needed to solve her problem or reach her goal. She possesses inner strength and the wisdom to be able to create, change and adapt as necessary.
1. A confident & secure woman REPOSITIONS HERSELF
A confident woman never forgets the one thing that never changes –THINGS CONSTANTLY CHANGE.
With the winds of change ever blowing, a secure woman realizes that she may not currently possess all the tools that will take her to her goal, but she’s always ready to learn what she needs to know in order to get there. This may mean going back to school, changing job or vocations or even moving to a different location, but she is ready, willing and able to adapt to changing circumstances.
2. A confident & secure woman KNOWS HOW TO GIVE AND TAKE
A confident woman understands that the gift is in the giving. She knows the laws that tell her what she gives will return to her several times over. She will give her time, energy and even her heart to those who need her. However, she also knows that she is not a super human and she does not over-extend herself. She regularly takes time for herself! She also recognizes that she has limits and, at times, finds herself in a position of needing assistance and is not afraid to ask for what she needs.
3. A confident & secure woman LIVES IN THE PRESENT
Dwelling on the past or worrying about the future is the bread of idleness that a confident woman refuses to eat. When recalling the past, she does not allow herself to dwell there but, rather, refocuses on the here and now. She understands that her past experiences, whether joyful or painful, are a part of her and have made her the confident person that she is today. She learns from the past and uses that information for current decision making. She has hopes for the future and engages in the occasional daydream while keeping herself solidly in the present tense of her life.
4. A confident & secure woman KEEPS HERE EYE ON THE PRIZE
Not everything we do comes up roses. To expect perfection is cavalier, but to know that mistakes are a part of the journey is wisdom. This knowledge allows the confident woman to refuse to pity herself when something doesn’t turn out as she’d hoped or expected it would.
5. A confident & secure woman KNOWS HOW TO SAY NO
Women have too little time and too much responsibility. The demands of jobs, child care, household duties, etc. are often draining. Having time to herself seems to be a far-fetched dream for many women.
The confident woman knows her limits and her need for self care. She understands that in order to be able to accomplish all that she wants/needs to do, she MUST have adequate energy reserves from which to draw. While sympathetic and even flattered when her phone rings off the hook with others making requests of her, she is able to pick and choose those people or causes to which/whom she will devote her time and energy. She knows when she needs to politely decline so that she will have time to recharge herself or to ward off becoming overwhelmed. She also does not feel a need to offer apologies or excuses for needing to do so.
6. A confident & secure woman TRUSTS HER INNER VOICE
While she may occasionally feel uncertain or seek the counsel of others, the confident woman knows deep down that her own heart will give her the direction she needs. While this intuition may be said to be a characteristic of all women, it is one that becomes refined only with age, wisdom and experience. The secure woman will carefully consider all the information at her disposal, seek advice from those she respects and then turn to that little voice inside of herself and become her own best counsel.
7. A confident & secure woman DOESN’T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF
If we allow ourselves to think too much about something or consider every little thing that could possibly come up or go awry, we can soon make mountains out of molehills. The secure woman is able to separate the chaff from the grain and focus only on those things of primary concern to her in any situation. She does not micro manage herself or her affairs. Rather, she focuses on the broader picture along with the key ingredients that are needed to solve her problem or reach her goal. She possesses inner strength and the wisdom to be able to create, change and adapt as necessary.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
8 Maariiage Ruts... Are you in One?
8 Marriage Ruts: Are You In One?
Whether you've been married for three months or three years, here's how to get out of routines that hurt your relationship. By The Nest Editors
Rut #1: Watching TV During DinnerWhy it's bad: Having dinner together offers valuable face time with your partner. Turning on the tube competes for attention and cuts in on your time to catch up and connect after so many hours spent apart.How to stop: Set aside 30 to 45 minutes of one-on-one talk time with the TV off every night. This shows your spouse that when you're not at work, you're devoted to your home and family. During this time, ignore your phone and leave the BlackBerry in another room. You'll feel closer within days.
Rut #2: Going Too Long Without SexWhy it's bad: If the amount of sex you're used to having starts to slide, your body and brain can get used to the decreased intimacy, causing you to go even longer without wanting that closeness.How to stop: Don't wait until you feel like doing it. Initiate sex when you're open to doing it, rather than when you have the desire. This will jump-start your feelings so you'll crave it more often.
Rut #3: Going a Whole Workday Without Talking to Your SweetheartWhy it's bad: You'll start growing apart emotionally after subconsciously feeling like the other person doesn't think about you (and your needs) during the day.How to stop: Initiate daily contact by sending a quick "How's your day?" email. And make the effort to do something nice every day (pick up his fave dessert, call from the store to see if she needs something). It shows forethought and consideration for your partner's needs.
Rut #4: Tuning Each Other OutWhy it's bad: You're disengaging from each other.How to stop: Make an effort to do small things such as kissing before saying good-bye, making eye contact when talking, and complimenting each other frequently throughout the week. Does he not seem to hear you talking during certain times (ahem, when ESPN is on)? Don't try to make conversation while the TV is on. If it's important, press mute; otherwise, save conversations for dinner or your bedroom, where you're less likely to be interrupted.
Rut #5: Not FightingWhy it's bad: Disagreements are good in a marriage because you're expressing your individuality. Talking about issues when they first happen makes them easier to fix than if you wait until after they've festered.How to stop: Bring up what's on your mind in a way that shows your admiration and respect for each other's thoughts and feelings. Like, "It hurts my feelings when ______. I was hoping we could figure out a new way to handle the situation together." This will set the tone of the conversation as loving and calm, but you both have to compromise to keep it that way.
Rut #6: Going out More with Friends Than with Your SpouseWhy it's bad: It sends the message that your friends are more worthy of your time.How to stop: Schedule nights out with your crew a few times a month, but make sure to let your partner know in advance. It's important to have these friendships as long as they don't make your married time sparse. And it's always best that these friends are people your partner knows and trusts, so there's less reason to worry.
Rut #7: Being Too CloseWhy it's bad: As much as you think burping, scratching, picking, or farting is funny or cute, it can backfire and cross the line. It may be a reflection of your closeness, but there should be a limit. Otherwise, you're leaving your partner with a very unsexy image of you.How to stop: Start a new rule. If you wouldn't do it in front of your work friends, don't do it in front of your honey. To get your mate to refrain, say: "I know we're close, and we can share everything, but I'd really appreciate it if you'd leave the room, or leave me out, when you do that. It's not very sexy, and I don't want anything that makes you less sexy to me."
Rut #8: Sharing Too Much with Your Parents or In-lawsWhy it's bad: This shows a lack of loyalty to your spouse. Your parents shouldn't have any information that your spouse doesn't have. And they shouldn't know anything he wouldn't want them to know.How to stop: Be loyal to your spouse even when she's not present. If you wouldn't say something in front of her, don't say it at all. You would want the same in return.
[Nestpert] Dr. Susan Fletcher is a licensed psychologist in private practice and the author of Parenting in the Smart Zone
Whether you've been married for three months or three years, here's how to get out of routines that hurt your relationship. By The Nest Editors
Rut #1: Watching TV During DinnerWhy it's bad: Having dinner together offers valuable face time with your partner. Turning on the tube competes for attention and cuts in on your time to catch up and connect after so many hours spent apart.How to stop: Set aside 30 to 45 minutes of one-on-one talk time with the TV off every night. This shows your spouse that when you're not at work, you're devoted to your home and family. During this time, ignore your phone and leave the BlackBerry in another room. You'll feel closer within days.
Rut #2: Going Too Long Without SexWhy it's bad: If the amount of sex you're used to having starts to slide, your body and brain can get used to the decreased intimacy, causing you to go even longer without wanting that closeness.How to stop: Don't wait until you feel like doing it. Initiate sex when you're open to doing it, rather than when you have the desire. This will jump-start your feelings so you'll crave it more often.
Rut #3: Going a Whole Workday Without Talking to Your SweetheartWhy it's bad: You'll start growing apart emotionally after subconsciously feeling like the other person doesn't think about you (and your needs) during the day.How to stop: Initiate daily contact by sending a quick "How's your day?" email. And make the effort to do something nice every day (pick up his fave dessert, call from the store to see if she needs something). It shows forethought and consideration for your partner's needs.
Rut #4: Tuning Each Other OutWhy it's bad: You're disengaging from each other.How to stop: Make an effort to do small things such as kissing before saying good-bye, making eye contact when talking, and complimenting each other frequently throughout the week. Does he not seem to hear you talking during certain times (ahem, when ESPN is on)? Don't try to make conversation while the TV is on. If it's important, press mute; otherwise, save conversations for dinner or your bedroom, where you're less likely to be interrupted.
Rut #5: Not FightingWhy it's bad: Disagreements are good in a marriage because you're expressing your individuality. Talking about issues when they first happen makes them easier to fix than if you wait until after they've festered.How to stop: Bring up what's on your mind in a way that shows your admiration and respect for each other's thoughts and feelings. Like, "It hurts my feelings when ______. I was hoping we could figure out a new way to handle the situation together." This will set the tone of the conversation as loving and calm, but you both have to compromise to keep it that way.
Rut #6: Going out More with Friends Than with Your SpouseWhy it's bad: It sends the message that your friends are more worthy of your time.How to stop: Schedule nights out with your crew a few times a month, but make sure to let your partner know in advance. It's important to have these friendships as long as they don't make your married time sparse. And it's always best that these friends are people your partner knows and trusts, so there's less reason to worry.
Rut #7: Being Too CloseWhy it's bad: As much as you think burping, scratching, picking, or farting is funny or cute, it can backfire and cross the line. It may be a reflection of your closeness, but there should be a limit. Otherwise, you're leaving your partner with a very unsexy image of you.How to stop: Start a new rule. If you wouldn't do it in front of your work friends, don't do it in front of your honey. To get your mate to refrain, say: "I know we're close, and we can share everything, but I'd really appreciate it if you'd leave the room, or leave me out, when you do that. It's not very sexy, and I don't want anything that makes you less sexy to me."
Rut #8: Sharing Too Much with Your Parents or In-lawsWhy it's bad: This shows a lack of loyalty to your spouse. Your parents shouldn't have any information that your spouse doesn't have. And they shouldn't know anything he wouldn't want them to know.How to stop: Be loyal to your spouse even when she's not present. If you wouldn't say something in front of her, don't say it at all. You would want the same in return.
[Nestpert] Dr. Susan Fletcher is a licensed psychologist in private practice and the author of Parenting in the Smart Zone
Monday, July 21, 2008
I feared
I Feared UNTIL……!!! I feared being aloneUntil I learned to like Myself.I feared failureUntil I realized that I only Fail when I don't try.I feared successUntil I realized that I had to try in order to be happy with myself..************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ***
I feared people's opinionsUntil I learned that people would have opinions about me anyway. I feared rejectionUntil I learned to have faith in myself.I feared painUntil I learned that it's necessary for growth************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *******
I feared the truthUntil I saw the ugliness in lies.I feared lifeUntil I experienced its beauty .I feared deathUntil I realized that it's not an end, but a beginning. ************ ********* ********* ********* ****** I feared my destiny,Until I realized that I had the power to change my life.I feared hateUntil I saw that it was nothing more than ignorance.I feared loveUntil it touched my heart, making the darkness fade into endless sunny days.************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *******I feared ridiculeUntil I learned how to laugh at myself. I feared growing oldUntil I realized that I gained wisdom every day.I feared the futureUntil I realized that Life just kept getting better.I feared the past Until I realized that It could no longer hurt me.************ ********* ********* ********* **
I feared the darkUntil I saw the beauty of the starlight.I feared the lightUntil I learned that the Truth would give me Strength.I feared change,Until I saw that even the most beautiful butterfly had to undergo a Metamorphosis before it could fly.************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *
I feared people's opinionsUntil I learned that people would have opinions about me anyway. I feared rejectionUntil I learned to have faith in myself.I feared painUntil I learned that it's necessary for growth************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *******
I feared the truthUntil I saw the ugliness in lies.I feared lifeUntil I experienced its beauty .I feared deathUntil I realized that it's not an end, but a beginning. ************ ********* ********* ********* ****** I feared my destiny,Until I realized that I had the power to change my life.I feared hateUntil I saw that it was nothing more than ignorance.I feared loveUntil it touched my heart, making the darkness fade into endless sunny days.************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *******I feared ridiculeUntil I learned how to laugh at myself. I feared growing oldUntil I realized that I gained wisdom every day.I feared the futureUntil I realized that Life just kept getting better.I feared the past Until I realized that It could no longer hurt me.************ ********* ********* ********* **
I feared the darkUntil I saw the beauty of the starlight.I feared the lightUntil I learned that the Truth would give me Strength.I feared change,Until I saw that even the most beautiful butterfly had to undergo a Metamorphosis before it could fly.************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *
Thursday, July 10, 2008
8 Hiring MistakesEmployers Make
Hiring decisions that result in "bad" hires sap your organization's time, training resources, and psychic energy. These are the top hiring mistakes to avoid during your recruiting and hiring process. Do these eight activities with care; your recruiting, interviewing and hiring practices will result in better hires. Better hires will help you develop a strong, healthy, productive, competitive organization.
Here are eight recruiting and hiring mistakes to avoid.
1. Do Not Pre-screen Candidates
A half hour phone call can save hours of your organization's time. Pre-screening applicants is a must for recruiting and hiring the best employees. You can discover whether the candidate has the knowledge and experience you need. You can screen for applicants who expect a salary that is out of your league. You can gain a sense about the person's congruity with your culture. Always pre-screen applicants.
2. Fail to Prepare the Candidate
If your applicant fails to ask about your company and the specifics of the job for which he or she has applied, help the applicant out. Prepare your applicants better for the interview, so interviewers spend their time on the important issues: determining the candidate's skills and fit within your culture. Prepare the candidate by describing the company, the details of the position, the background and titles of the interviewers, and whatever will eliminate time wasting while the candidate interviews within your company.
3. Fail to Prepare the Interviewers
You wouldn't choose a college for your child or launch a project without a plan. Why, then, do organizations put so little planning into interviewing candidates for positions? Interviewers need to meet in advance and create a plan. Who is responsible for which types of questions? What aspect of the candidate's credentials is each person assessing? Who is assessing culture fit. Plan to succeed in employee selection in advance.
4. Rely on the Interview to Evaluate a Candidate
The interview is a lot of talk. And most frequently, because applicants are not prepped in advance, a lot of interview time is spent giving the candidate information about your organization. Even more time is invested in different interviewers asking the candidate the same questions over and over.
During an interview, candidates tell you what they think you want to hear because they want to successfully obtain a job offer. Organizations are smart when they develop several methods for evaluating candidates in addition to the interview.
According to the Chally Group, a Human Resources consulting firm, in, The Most Common Hiring Mistakes, research at the University of Michigan found that, "The typical interview increases the likelihood of choosing the best candidate by less than 2%. In other words, if you just 'flipped' a coin you would be correct 50% of the time. If you added an interview you would only be right 52% of the time."
5. Do Nothing But Talk During an Interview
Every interview needs to have components other than questions, answers and discussion. Walk the candidate through the company. Ask about his or her experience with situations you point out during the walk. In a manufacturing company, ask how the candidate would improve a process.
Watch the candidate perform a task such as separating parts or components to get a feel for their "hands-on" ability. Have a documentation or writing candidate write a description of the steps in one of your work processes. See how quickly a person learns a particular task. Ask how the candidate would approach improving the quality of a given accounting process.
As long as you use tests and tasks that are directly related to the position for which the individual is interviewing, you will earn reams of relevent information to use in your selection process.
6. Evaluate "Personality," Not Job Skills and Experience
Sure, it would be nice for you to like everyone at work. But, this is much less important than recruiting the strongest, smartest, best candidates you can find. People tend to hire people who are similar to themselves. They are the most comfortable with those candidates, of course.
This will kill your organization over time. You need diverse people with diverse personalities to deal with diverse employees and customers. Think about the customer that drives you crazy. Isn't it likely that a new employee with a similar personality would have the same problem? Likewise, hiring a candidate because you enjoyed and liked him or her, as the main qualification, ignores your need for particular skills and experience. Don't do it.
7. Fail to Differentiate, Via Testing and Discussion, the Critical Job Skills
How do you differentiate one candidate from another? Everyone has a "wish list" for all of the qualities, skills, personality factors, experience and interests you want to see in your selected employee. You must decide on, and perhaps, test, the skills you most desire in your candidate.
What are the three - four most critical factors for contribution and success given the job, the skills of the other employees and the needs of your customers? Once you have identified these, you cannot "settle" on a candidate that does not bring these to your workplace. Or you will fail.
8. Develop a Small Candidate Pool
Take the time to build a candidate pool with several candidates who meet the needs of your organization. If you don't have to make a choice among several qualified candidates, your pool is too small. Don't "settle" for someone if you don't have the right person with the skills and experience you need. It's better to reopen your search.
These mistakes are often fatal to a candidate's ultimate success within your organization. If you do these activities successfully, you increase the probability of a happy, successful employee contributing what you need from him or her to your organization.
Here are eight recruiting and hiring mistakes to avoid.
1. Do Not Pre-screen Candidates
A half hour phone call can save hours of your organization's time. Pre-screening applicants is a must for recruiting and hiring the best employees. You can discover whether the candidate has the knowledge and experience you need. You can screen for applicants who expect a salary that is out of your league. You can gain a sense about the person's congruity with your culture. Always pre-screen applicants.
2. Fail to Prepare the Candidate
If your applicant fails to ask about your company and the specifics of the job for which he or she has applied, help the applicant out. Prepare your applicants better for the interview, so interviewers spend their time on the important issues: determining the candidate's skills and fit within your culture. Prepare the candidate by describing the company, the details of the position, the background and titles of the interviewers, and whatever will eliminate time wasting while the candidate interviews within your company.
3. Fail to Prepare the Interviewers
You wouldn't choose a college for your child or launch a project without a plan. Why, then, do organizations put so little planning into interviewing candidates for positions? Interviewers need to meet in advance and create a plan. Who is responsible for which types of questions? What aspect of the candidate's credentials is each person assessing? Who is assessing culture fit. Plan to succeed in employee selection in advance.
4. Rely on the Interview to Evaluate a Candidate
The interview is a lot of talk. And most frequently, because applicants are not prepped in advance, a lot of interview time is spent giving the candidate information about your organization. Even more time is invested in different interviewers asking the candidate the same questions over and over.
During an interview, candidates tell you what they think you want to hear because they want to successfully obtain a job offer. Organizations are smart when they develop several methods for evaluating candidates in addition to the interview.
According to the Chally Group, a Human Resources consulting firm, in, The Most Common Hiring Mistakes, research at the University of Michigan found that, "The typical interview increases the likelihood of choosing the best candidate by less than 2%. In other words, if you just 'flipped' a coin you would be correct 50% of the time. If you added an interview you would only be right 52% of the time."
5. Do Nothing But Talk During an Interview
Every interview needs to have components other than questions, answers and discussion. Walk the candidate through the company. Ask about his or her experience with situations you point out during the walk. In a manufacturing company, ask how the candidate would improve a process.
Watch the candidate perform a task such as separating parts or components to get a feel for their "hands-on" ability. Have a documentation or writing candidate write a description of the steps in one of your work processes. See how quickly a person learns a particular task. Ask how the candidate would approach improving the quality of a given accounting process.
As long as you use tests and tasks that are directly related to the position for which the individual is interviewing, you will earn reams of relevent information to use in your selection process.
6. Evaluate "Personality," Not Job Skills and Experience
Sure, it would be nice for you to like everyone at work. But, this is much less important than recruiting the strongest, smartest, best candidates you can find. People tend to hire people who are similar to themselves. They are the most comfortable with those candidates, of course.
This will kill your organization over time. You need diverse people with diverse personalities to deal with diverse employees and customers. Think about the customer that drives you crazy. Isn't it likely that a new employee with a similar personality would have the same problem? Likewise, hiring a candidate because you enjoyed and liked him or her, as the main qualification, ignores your need for particular skills and experience. Don't do it.
7. Fail to Differentiate, Via Testing and Discussion, the Critical Job Skills
How do you differentiate one candidate from another? Everyone has a "wish list" for all of the qualities, skills, personality factors, experience and interests you want to see in your selected employee. You must decide on, and perhaps, test, the skills you most desire in your candidate.
What are the three - four most critical factors for contribution and success given the job, the skills of the other employees and the needs of your customers? Once you have identified these, you cannot "settle" on a candidate that does not bring these to your workplace. Or you will fail.
8. Develop a Small Candidate Pool
Take the time to build a candidate pool with several candidates who meet the needs of your organization. If you don't have to make a choice among several qualified candidates, your pool is too small. Don't "settle" for someone if you don't have the right person with the skills and experience you need. It's better to reopen your search.
These mistakes are often fatal to a candidate's ultimate success within your organization. If you do these activities successfully, you increase the probability of a happy, successful employee contributing what you need from him or her to your organization.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
The Female always makes the Rules
1. The Female always makes The Rules.
2. The Rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.
3. No Male can possibly know all The Rules.
4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all The Rules, she must immediately change some or all of The Rules.
5. The Female is never wrong.
6. If the Female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding which was a direct result of something the Male did or said wrong. (If Rule 6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.)
7. The Female can change her mind at any given point in time.
8. The Male must never change his mind without express written consent from the Female.
9. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
10. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female Wants him to be angry or upset.
11. The Female must under no circumstances let the Male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The Male is expected to mind read at all times.
13. The Male who doesn't abide by The Rules, can't take the heat, lacks a backbone, and is a wimp.
14. Any attempt to document The Rules could result in bodily harm.
15. At no time can the Male make such comments as "Insignificant" and "Is that all?" when the Female is complaining.
16. If the Female has PMS, all The Rules are null and void!
2. The Rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.
3. No Male can possibly know all The Rules.
4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all The Rules, she must immediately change some or all of The Rules.
5. The Female is never wrong.
6. If the Female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding which was a direct result of something the Male did or said wrong. (If Rule 6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.)
7. The Female can change her mind at any given point in time.
8. The Male must never change his mind without express written consent from the Female.
9. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
10. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female Wants him to be angry or upset.
11. The Female must under no circumstances let the Male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The Male is expected to mind read at all times.
13. The Male who doesn't abide by The Rules, can't take the heat, lacks a backbone, and is a wimp.
14. Any attempt to document The Rules could result in bodily harm.
15. At no time can the Male make such comments as "Insignificant" and "Is that all?" when the Female is complaining.
16. If the Female has PMS, all The Rules are null and void!
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